Reasons to Be Happy: A Play by Neil LaBute

Author:Neil LaBute [LABUTE, NEIL]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: DRA000000, DRA001000
ISBN: 9781468308488
Publisher: The Overlook Press
Published: 2013-06-05T00:00:00+00:00

A restaurant patio.

STEPH and GREG outside. GREG holding a restaurant pager and looking at a nearby window. STEPH is watching him.

STEPH … hey. You like my dress?/ I bought it for tonight. Special.

GREG Yes … it’s really cute./ ( Beat.) Wait, you’re trying to trick me … that’s a skirt, right, not a …? With a top.

STEPH A blouse.

GREG A blouse. On top.

STEPH Actually, yeah./ ( Smiles.) Good job!

GREG I remember …/ You taught me that. Yep.

GREG smiles and turns away. STEPH keeps an eye on him.

STEPH … you don’t really wanna be here, do you?/ Greg.

GREG …/ What?

STEPH It’s true.

GREG Steph.

STEPH No, I can tell. It’s alright, just say so.

GREG I’m … ( Turns to her. ) I’m sorry, I was just thinking, that’s all.

STEPH That’s ok. Thinking’s allowed.

GREG Thanks.

STEPH As long as it’s about “me.” ( Smiles.) I hope it was, anyway.

GREG Yeah, no, it was. Mostly about you and, you know. Us.

STEPH Uh-oh.

GREG No, no, there’s no “uh-oh,” I’m just … I’ve got lots of stuff going on, racing around in my head. (Grins.) Sorry. I’ve been looking forward to this, so …

STEPH Good. Me too.

GREG Great.

STEPH This restaurant looks nice … busy, but …

GREG Yeah, another one of those places that we always said we were gonna try and didn’t. (Beat.) After we broke up, I never really wanted to go by myself—even if we never went there—if we’d talked about it then it felt like it was one of “our” spots so I didn’t wanna ruin it. Does that at all make sense? (Beat.) NO! It’s weird, right?

STEPH No, I get it./ That’s sweet.

GREG Yeah?/ Thanks.

STEPH (Looking around.) I don’t think I’ve even done Turkish in my life before, so … what kinda stuff is it?/ Hummus?

GREG Ummmm, you know …/ Yeah. Kebobs and that kind of thing, too. Mint.

STEPH Like, “shish kebobs,” you mean?

GREG Yep, like on … ( Mimes.) … a stick. They probably don’t use actual sticks, but … it’s the same idea.

STEPH Right. Ok. Sounds … European. Or Asian. Which one are they?/ People from Turkey?

GREG Ahhhh, they’re …/ Technically neither, I think. It’s Asia Minor. Or Anatolia.

STEPH Huh. ’Cause they’re right down there on a map where it gets … all … messy. Right?/ At the bottom, by … ( Miming.) … the …

GREG Ha!/ Yeah, down by all those countries that’re … it’s a jumble down there!

STEPH I know! Fuck, I used to hate Geography. In school. Hated that shit … ( Beat.) We live in America, for God’s sake, who gives a shit where the straits of Gibraltar are … right?

GREG Yeah. Absolutely. (Beat. ) I think there’s just one of ’em, but yes. I agree.

STEPH One what?

GREG Doesn’t matter. (Beat.) Should I check on our … with the hostess?

STEPH Nah, it’s ok. I don’t mind waiting. It’s nice out. (She points.) Why don’t we just sit until the little thingie buzzes?

GREG ’Kay.

They wander over to a bench and take a seat. They hold hands. GREG studies the buzzer.

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